Depression is a longtime roommate of mine, so I hope you believe me when I tell you that it's inverse is not happiness but “vitality”, and litres of that come pouring out of your writing.
I'm glad you drew a connection between shared struggle as a state of "not being alone".
I'm Puerto Rican, we also tend to see shared struggle as a unifyer. We call it “La Brega”.
my personal view is that when someone moves away from this shared struggle that we are all molded by for individual gain what they are doing is categorically anti-human.
Usually people achieve this do so by being an assimilationist or a colonizer, but when culture or the ppl around you dehumanize you or make demands of you that you cut off your own humanity (psychic mutilation), those are also the situations you see people end their lives. Capitalism white supremacy and patriarchy make these demands of us to "conform or be marginalized" as a matter of their nature.
Being human is the most beautiful and perfect thing you could be, and it's worth more being human than being dead (or deadened by a system)!
I hope this writing wasn't instigated by any real life event, and if it was I hope it was one that turned out okay 🙏. Thanks for writing about this. Mental health is important.
I love this Josh. So many of our mental health struggles are created or exacerbated because we are told we are alone against the world, rather than part of it.
You are also putting into words something that I have struggled to explain about my mental state, which is that I am sad often, but resist the label 'depressed' (and indeed I have not been assessed for that ever, so it would be inappropriate). I started writing this in the middle of the night, when one of my demons took momentary hold. I have found that my emotions will be expressed one way or another, and it is up to me to leverage them in a productive pursuit or a self-destructive one. In the end, even when all else looks bleak, reminding myself that being sad means I share an experience with others who are sad makes me realise you are never alone in suffering.
Very well written piece which drew me in. I lost both my partner and brother to suicide. Both of them were young, both had complex issues and looking back I think both of them did what they had to do at the time and were only going to spend life in and out of institutions. I too have tried to commit suicide in the past and it’s fairly normal for me to think about it (I don’t like the word ideation because professionals use that to dismiss (often mistakenly) people who actually do have intent and go on to complete suicide. I get your point though. We all suffer. Life is suffering . Living in the moment and as you say smelling the grass , flowers etc helps .. I long since stopped lying to myself that ‘it will get better’ as many people tend to claim when trying to convince someone not to die - that is because tomorrow does not exist -it never comes and your article about just being and letting go of ego is a really fresh outlook - these days I remond myself never to invest in outcomes and it allows me way more freedom - I had a great night tonight because I just went along with the flow - zero expectations - best nite I’ve had in ages. Thanks again for an original and absorbing piece of writing
I am so happy to hear you had a great night, one great night is all we need sometimes to make up for numerous bad ones. I hope you flow into more of those.
Sorry but this just feels condescending to me and nothing that someone who is suicidal hasn't heard before. Other people have pain? So what? Yes, I can enjoy the grass or a book or whatever. At the end of the day, we all have to love our lives. It doesn't matter what others feel about us or the world. It feels really tone deaf. Glad for you that you never wanted to kill yourself but telling other people what to do when you haven't even been near their shoes is a bit much.
This is how I make myself feel better: by writing, sharing, and inviting others to share too. There are worse coping mechanisms; if mine means people sometimes feel offended or critical of what I write, well, it's a price worth paying.
"Children crying in public don’t repel me. They are my clarion call. I can’t get over roadkill, and why should I? I mourn people decades before they die. I am proud of them well before they earn it. I never manage to stay angry at anyone, including myself."
If FB hadn't blocked me ("Maybe you've been hacked"), I couldn't resist sharing prose marvelous as this. And if I wasn't so fucking old, I'd swim the Channel for no more than a chance to quaff a flute of your bathwater.
Step 1: get people to stop killing themselves (and entice the state to stop expanding their death-on-demand services as solutions of bureaucratic incompetence and medical money-savers). Chip away at addictions, and deaths of despair. This includes shallow materialism, debt slavery, food addiction, etc.
Step 2: get people to form stable pair-bonds and have children.
Step 3: teach those children to have pride in their culture, and defend their nations and their ways of life as their forefathers did.
I daresay if we had this kind of cultural consensus and the innately-fulfilling sense of purpose that comes from building and defending one's home we would see significantly fewer deaths in the West (especially among men, who are the majority).
The Holly MathNerd post is great. What I would say about your suggestions is that you don't have a solution for the billions of people who don't live in the West, and yet their lives and those of their loved ones could end in a second because of decisions taken in the West. They can't defend themselves.
This is probably not what you were aiming at, but I’ve been convinced for a while that, if you really want to commit suicide, the only acceptable way is to go to the frontline in Ukraine, or, if you’re too far away and too poor, to die in the attempt to get there.
I can’t really understand this post, but it offers an interesting contrast to those women who say they’re too hot and too good at social manipulation to be answering emails, and should instead be wreaking havoc by seducing ever more powerful men, starting wars and tearing kingdoms apart, as they’d have done in the good old days.
Very interesting point. If you were to kill yourself, doesn't that mean that you can now embark on a dangerous adventure that you'd otherwise be disinclined from? I wonder how many people in extremely dangerous professions have that death wish to begin with.
Depression is a longtime roommate of mine, so I hope you believe me when I tell you that it's inverse is not happiness but “vitality”, and litres of that come pouring out of your writing.
I'm glad you drew a connection between shared struggle as a state of "not being alone".
I'm Puerto Rican, we also tend to see shared struggle as a unifyer. We call it “La Brega”.
my personal view is that when someone moves away from this shared struggle that we are all molded by for individual gain what they are doing is categorically anti-human.
Usually people achieve this do so by being an assimilationist or a colonizer, but when culture or the ppl around you dehumanize you or make demands of you that you cut off your own humanity (psychic mutilation), those are also the situations you see people end their lives. Capitalism white supremacy and patriarchy make these demands of us to "conform or be marginalized" as a matter of their nature.
Being human is the most beautiful and perfect thing you could be, and it's worth more being human than being dead (or deadened by a system)!
I hope this writing wasn't instigated by any real life event, and if it was I hope it was one that turned out okay 🙏. Thanks for writing about this. Mental health is important.
I love this Josh. So many of our mental health struggles are created or exacerbated because we are told we are alone against the world, rather than part of it.
You are also putting into words something that I have struggled to explain about my mental state, which is that I am sad often, but resist the label 'depressed' (and indeed I have not been assessed for that ever, so it would be inappropriate). I started writing this in the middle of the night, when one of my demons took momentary hold. I have found that my emotions will be expressed one way or another, and it is up to me to leverage them in a productive pursuit or a self-destructive one. In the end, even when all else looks bleak, reminding myself that being sad means I share an experience with others who are sad makes me realise you are never alone in suffering.
This was perfection. Tens, tens, tens.
thank you x
I adore my demons because befriending is proof that I’ve gotten stronger. Would miss them if I were to fade into nothingness.
Very well written piece which drew me in. I lost both my partner and brother to suicide. Both of them were young, both had complex issues and looking back I think both of them did what they had to do at the time and were only going to spend life in and out of institutions. I too have tried to commit suicide in the past and it’s fairly normal for me to think about it (I don’t like the word ideation because professionals use that to dismiss (often mistakenly) people who actually do have intent and go on to complete suicide. I get your point though. We all suffer. Life is suffering . Living in the moment and as you say smelling the grass , flowers etc helps .. I long since stopped lying to myself that ‘it will get better’ as many people tend to claim when trying to convince someone not to die - that is because tomorrow does not exist -it never comes and your article about just being and letting go of ego is a really fresh outlook - these days I remond myself never to invest in outcomes and it allows me way more freedom - I had a great night tonight because I just went along with the flow - zero expectations - best nite I’ve had in ages. Thanks again for an original and absorbing piece of writing
I am so happy to hear you had a great night, one great night is all we need sometimes to make up for numerous bad ones. I hope you flow into more of those.
Great, Stella. I bet this was what some of your readers needed to read.
Thank you, David. I hope so.
Sorry but this just feels condescending to me and nothing that someone who is suicidal hasn't heard before. Other people have pain? So what? Yes, I can enjoy the grass or a book or whatever. At the end of the day, we all have to love our lives. It doesn't matter what others feel about us or the world. It feels really tone deaf. Glad for you that you never wanted to kill yourself but telling other people what to do when you haven't even been near their shoes is a bit much.
This is how I make myself feel better: by writing, sharing, and inviting others to share too. There are worse coping mechanisms; if mine means people sometimes feel offended or critical of what I write, well, it's a price worth paying.
"Children crying in public don’t repel me. They are my clarion call. I can’t get over roadkill, and why should I? I mourn people decades before they die. I am proud of them well before they earn it. I never manage to stay angry at anyone, including myself."
If FB hadn't blocked me ("Maybe you've been hacked"), I couldn't resist sharing prose marvelous as this. And if I wasn't so fucking old, I'd swim the Channel for no more than a chance to quaff a flute of your bathwater.
Holly MathNerd wrote a profound (and popular) essay in the same vein: https://hollymathnerd.substack.com/p/world-suicide-prevention-day-2022
But I think we need to aim higher.
Step 1: get people to stop killing themselves (and entice the state to stop expanding their death-on-demand services as solutions of bureaucratic incompetence and medical money-savers). Chip away at addictions, and deaths of despair. This includes shallow materialism, debt slavery, food addiction, etc.
Step 2: get people to form stable pair-bonds and have children.
Step 3: teach those children to have pride in their culture, and defend their nations and their ways of life as their forefathers did.
I daresay if we had this kind of cultural consensus and the innately-fulfilling sense of purpose that comes from building and defending one's home we would see significantly fewer deaths in the West (especially among men, who are the majority).
https://jmpolemic.substack.com/p/the-united-states-of-addiction
The Holly MathNerd post is great. What I would say about your suggestions is that you don't have a solution for the billions of people who don't live in the West, and yet their lives and those of their loved ones could end in a second because of decisions taken in the West. They can't defend themselves.
Now that's content
thanks x
This is probably not what you were aiming at, but I’ve been convinced for a while that, if you really want to commit suicide, the only acceptable way is to go to the frontline in Ukraine, or, if you’re too far away and too poor, to die in the attempt to get there.
I can’t really understand this post, but it offers an interesting contrast to those women who say they’re too hot and too good at social manipulation to be answering emails, and should instead be wreaking havoc by seducing ever more powerful men, starting wars and tearing kingdoms apart, as they’d have done in the good old days.
Very interesting point. If you were to kill yourself, doesn't that mean that you can now embark on a dangerous adventure that you'd otherwise be disinclined from? I wonder how many people in extremely dangerous professions have that death wish to begin with.
I just love the way you storytell, even when you make no sense ♥️
And I love the fact you love my story telling despite me not always making sense ❤️