the boys who keep me young - ChadPup series Part 2

rich millennials Vs hungry zoomers

I am doing a recording because I believe my writing needs to be read in my accent to be understood, but KEEP YOUR HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM, GENTLEMEN.

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This post is the second instalment of the ChadPup series.

Part 1 (Sunday section) and Part 3

I like men who look like homosexuals, I tell the two Oxford PPE Private Equity guys my girlfriend invited to entertain us and pick up the tab.

“So you like Englishmen,” says the American of the two.

Precisely.

We have been talking about private pension policy for the last half an hour, despite the males of the table suggesting the girls (one Financial Times journalist and one Very Respected Political Commentator) don’t care about such boring topics like how money is made.

We are in a white tablecloth Polish restaurant in South Kensington, and I have had two shots of vodka and three glasses of wine. The pierogis in my stomach are working overtime to stop me from turning the night into a shocking Substack post.

Why don’t we talk about sex and gender politics instead, suggests one of them.

You had me on the first part, I add with the decisiveness of a woman who wants to earn a living from her writing.

I bet Stella is the most sexually deviant of the two of you, says the campier of the two of them.

What makes you think that? my fiery friend fights back. Stella is more vanilla.

I nod in agreement (it is always the quiet ones!!) and quote myself: My favourite position is missionary with a man I love.